Pride, Pottery & Paws with Fluid Pottery

Maker, Muse & Cat Parent: Meet Megan from Fluid Pottery

I'm Megan Hope Tock. I use they/them pronouns — though I do also use she/her, but they/them is my preference. Hope is my middle name, but I use it a lot for my business because it feels like me — Megan Hope. Tock is my wife’s last name, which I use officially. I don’t use my old last name; I don’t really like to associate with that, to be honest.

(Megan's cats knock their treat jar off the coffee table.)

They’re clearly the center of attention — my two cats, Jeffrey and Travis. And then there’s my wife, Nicky. We’ve been together for five years this year, and we just celebrated our one-year wedding anniversary. We eloped in the botanical gardens here in Christchurch. It was such a lovely day — we slept in, had mimosas, got brunch with some friends, and then we were like, “Oh, better get married!” We went to the pub afterwards and her family and our friends were there — it was really good!

If I had to describe myself... My wife and I — we’re very much a team. But the creative side? That’s very me. I’ve always been a creative person. It’s how I express myself and process my feelings. I remember stories from when I was growing up — if I got really angry, I’d draw a picture of how I felt. It might be an angry or sad person, and I guess that still represents me in a way. Nicky is very logical, so we really balance each other out. She’s my best friend and my partner. I’d do anything for her — and anything for my cats!

So yeah — creativity, my wife, and my cats. That’s just who I am.

I love thrifting, sustainability, and the environment. I’m vegan. I love people — but I’ve learned I’m not great at working with people too much, like in hospitality. It drains me. Since doing Fluid Pottery full-time from home, I’ve been so much happier. I get to interact with the people I love the most — queer people, my family, and my friends.

I’m originally from Australia. I lived there until I was about 18. I grew up in a very religious, conservative family — despite what they might say. I wasn’t allowed to go to school after age 12. I have six siblings; we’re all one year apart, and they’re all still in Australia, I believe. Beyond religion, it just wasn’t a great upbringing. At 18, I decided to leave. We were living in Queensland, about eight hours inland, and I just got on a bus to Brisbane.

Brisbane is where I really grew up. We moved around a lot — sometimes we didn’t have anywhere to live and were homeless. When I got to Brisbane at 18, I moved in with my brother, who was married. That was... strange. One day, they just told me I had to leave. I ended up staying at my sister’s boyfriend’s family’s house — which was also an experience for me at the time. They were lovely, I just wasn’t use to normal people.

My older siblings kind of broke away from the family, but now they’re all very reintegrated. It’s their way or no way, especially when it comes to religion and their lifestyle.

I saw an ad about Canada, and — me being me, with ADHD — I thought, yeah, I can do that. I got a job at McDonald’s, learned how to make coffee, and since I didn’t have much of a social life or know how to “be normal,” I just walked to work, saved money, came home — repeat. After about 10 months, I moved to Canada.

It was a working holiday visa that turned into almost three years. I was going to be sponsored. A lot happened.  I started going to church there. I was confused about everything. Honestly, I thought everyone who wasn’t Christian was evil at the time. But I went because I wanted to see the pretty mountains I’d seen in that ad.

While going to church and being religious, I ended up in an abusive relationship. I learned a lot about myself and reality. Eventually, I had to leave because of issues with the bridging visa for sponsorship. There’s a lot more to that story — like finally coming out to my religious closeted gay friend a month before I had to go — but one month later, I had to go. I came to New Zealand while waiting for my new visa, and then the COVID lockdown happened.

That time in lockdown changed everything. I couldn’t run anymore. Moving had always been my solution when life felt too much. But suddenly, I had to stay put. And I hated how much I loved it here.

I was living in a flat in Queenstown and met my friend Nardia. She’s lovely. She just had a baby about a year ago and is married now —  but I met her back when she and her partner were early into their relationship. Around that time, I was finally starting to embrace who I was. Then I met Nicky on Bumble — she lived just around the corner.

To sum myself up... I’ve become the person I used to hate — or thought I hated. I now realized I use to keep suicide as a Plan B, as I was always quite depressed. I thought, I’ll try life again and become the person I hate. If it doesn’t work then I’ll k*ll myself. But with a lot of therapy and great medication, I’ve become unapologetically me. I’ve learned to be honest. I’ve learned what a social filter is. I’ve found people who are humble, safe, and loving. I don’t have time for drama — no one does.

I understand now what chosen family really means. People say being gay is a choice — but I didn’t choose to be gay. I am. What I did choose was to love the people who love me. I choose my chosen family.

I couldn’t be happier.

A couple of years ago, my family called. They said they were sorry. I asked, “Sorry for what?” and they replied, “Oh, no — you have to tell us.” I said no — that they needed therapy. It was a longer conversation than that. They said things like, “Oh, we’re sorry we left your brother in a park to starve when he was young”,, “Maybe you felt judged or something.”

I just kept telling them: You need therapy. I don’t want to be part of this. I told them, I’m happy. You couldn’t even do the bare minimum when you chose to have me.

I’m so loved now. I’m so happy I’m here. I never thought I’d be able to be creative and run a business.

A big part of what I do now is helping other people have a voice — even in subtle ways. I never thought I was allowed to be happy. I never thought I was allowed to laugh. I never hugged anyone. I never thought I was allowed to be gay.

Even now, I sometimes experience hate — I’ve had people shout slurs at me from cars, or make homophobic comments in past jobs. But I stay kind. Because I wouldn’t be unapologetically me if I hadn’t met kind queer people who accepted me when I didn’t even accept myself. Back when I was a little Christian girl thinking, they’re all going to hell — those kind, loving queer people showed me otherwise.

And that was my projection, right?

What is one of your favorite things about Ōtautahi's queer scene?

I think it's honest. From what I've experienced through different shows, gatherings, and the community, people feel okay to be who they are. They don't feel scared because they're in a safe place together. I remember talking with my wife, Nicky—I was like, it's so cool how people can do a performance or speak amongst friends and there's no judgement. So yeah, I think it's honest. I like the honesty.

What do you think Ōtautahi's queer scene is missing?

More people and more freedom—But I think we need more acceptance, and that all comes with a big community. Unfortunately, the more of us there are, the louder we are and that’s scary. Maybe we need to be more connected. Maybe there are more of us, and we're just not connected. Community is key to staying strong.

What is one moment you believe shaped who you are today?

There could be so many moments to pick from, but I immediately go back to when I was in Queenstown during lockdown. I was sitting in Frankton, on a large bit of grass that looks out over Frankton Beach, and I remember sitting there and choosing to be me—I chose to try and be me.

What does being queer mean to you?

I think being queer goes beyond just being gay. It's more than just your sexuality, more than your gender identity. I think it's about being a bit louder—you know, laws haven't been changed by being quiet. Being queer is a choice to be yourself, to be expressive, and to be different from how society wants you to be if that’s who you are.

Like even small things, I go outside and I don't shave my legs, even though so many people expect me to. I personally know someone who is also gay and who says, "Oh, what will people think?"—and perhaps that's an example of someone who's gay versus someone who is queer. Because I don't conform to what society wants me to be. So queerness, to me, is the bravery to be yourself—however that looks for you.

What is your current guilty pleasure?

I love going op shopping. I love the different clothes—old clothes that you can mix and match and use to express yourself. Like, it's a warm day, you've just gone op shopping, you've got a hot coffee, and then you come back and spend five hours on the couch watching your favourite show. I just want to repeat that every day.

I think my guilty pleasure is trying to have that kind of day every day—but you can't. I just want coffee in the sun, find a cute little top, and then talk to my wife for hours. I know that sounds boring, but it's the little things I love.

What would you say are your love languages? and how do you show them in everyday life?

Quality time—I’ll always make time for the people I love. And words are so important; communication is so important. So, time and communication—and obviously acts of service. But quality time and words of affirmation are at the top of my list.

If you could travel anywhere right now where would you go and what would you do?

I want to go to a beach—literally—and just lie there like a hot potato with Nicky. We never really got to experience our honeymoon; Nicky got COVID straight after the wedding. So it would just be so nice for us to go somewhere warm and just lie there... with sunscreen, but still like a hot potato.

have you ever felt unsafe as a queer person in your industry?

Always, yeah. I think in general I get nervous—like, should I put on my website that I’m queer? Of course I worry, because I still get nervous walking down the street. I don’t know who’s going to pull up, because I’ve had that happen before.

I love that I can work for myself, and I feel so safe at home. So hopefully this takes off even more. But in my industry specifically, of course you do get those looks—even at markets. I’ve had people give me the “side-eye," and it’s fine. I don’t take offense to it. I know they’re wrong, and that behaviour is not okay—but I’m still standing strong.

I’ve had people say, “Oh wait, why aren’t you making straight things as well?” and my reply was, “what about - I am straight, but I appreciate.” That’s funny to me, I said I’ll put that on a coaster.

But for real, I’m not invalidating your experience. I’m just standing up for mine, and for those who are my biggest customers—because that’s my community, and I want to enjoy that. Why can’t I do the things that I love?

I’ve had comments and looks, and I do get worried about putting it on my website—but I’m going to do it. I’m all about being comfortable in your skin and who you are. That’s a big part of why I’m doing a lot of the p**y plates or yoni plates—I think it’s about expressing how every body is different, and everyone is beautiful.

What's one myth or stereotype about queer people that you're tired of hearing?

I hate the “Who wears the pants?” question. We both do! We’re very much a team. Who wears pants? We both own pants...

There are certain things—like, I love when Nicky drives. I don’t want to drive. But I’ll happily make bagels at home. And yeah, Nicky does all the power tools stuff... okay, maybe—no, I’m kidding! We’re a team.

I don’t like that question because it implies that a valid relationship relies on a masculine and a feminine role, when that just doesn’t exist. In fact, Nicky’s more girly than I am. She might look more masc—she often gets mistaken for a fella—but then she turns around and has big t*ts like, “Who’s the fella??”

walk me through your creative process with pottery start to finish.

There are two avenues to it. There's the logical thought process—like, “I need to make this plate”—so I make sure I have the right clay. I knead it, roll it, carve it out, press it into foam, smooth it down, let it dry, fire it, get it back, glaze it...

And then there's another part of me that’s very artistic. I’ve made things that are really emotional to me. I once made a sculpture of a woman’s body—more of a realistic version—and there’s a hand in it that represents a miscarriage. I’ve had a miscarriage before. Even though I didn’t want to have a kid, it was still emotional.

Sometimes I get lost in it—I’ll be there for hours, just making little sculptures, creating really emotional pieces. It’s about making things that have a story. It might be my story, but you could hold it and it might hold a different story for you—and that’s your story.

I love making pieces that mean something to somebody. I have a few ideas for paintings that would take hours and hours to finish, but they carry really strong meaning.

I like making pieces that make those who are uncomfortable feel comfortable—and those who are comfortable feel uncomfortable. So yeah, those are the two sides of my process. And sometimes, my really creative pieces sell before I even get the chance to take a photo of them.

How do you stay inspired with your designs?

They’re always changing—that’s why I love the name Fluid Pottery, because it’s all fluid! I have an idea, and I just go with it. I don’t confine myself to a box or any one thing. I’m always open to change, so I think I’m always inspired. I move with change and how I’m feeling.

I think it’s hard when a design requires a lot of time and motivation—I’m more likely to scrap it and never look at it again because I can imagine the finished piece in my head and get the dopamine from that. You know, ADHD things.

Then, financially, the motivation to work for myself and not for anyone else is always there—that’s why I get up in the morning.

If you could create a pottery piece for any queer icon who would it be and what would you make them?

There’s a singer—I don’t even know if she’s queer—but her name is Paris Paloma. She sings that song “Labour,” but she also has a lot of other songs that are really powerful to me. I think it’s just about being a woman, or being a minority—in other words, not a cis white man. It’s quite powerful music, and music really inspires me. I would love to make a piece for her.

There are some people who are very brave, like Miley Cyrus—beautiful voice, right? But she and other queer singers, if you think about it, have had cameras chasing them around since they were teenagers, and yet they were still brave enough to come out. That's iconic.

But I don’t want to just make something for them—I want them to come and make it. I’ll be a part of the process, but they will make it. It’s just more special if you make it together. I don’t think I answered your question correctly.

what is your most unhinged pottery creation?

You know I make a lot and then put it back into reclaim so then I never actually finish them, but I definitely have made a few, I tried to make b**bs but they ended up looking like balls so I made a p*nis and it was an incense holder. But then it cracked so it went back into reclaim so it doesn't exist now. I'm not sure how realistic it was anyway I haven't seen many p*nises in my life. I’m also starting a Vulva project, and I sell p*ssy plates.

how did your love for pottery begin?

For my birthday, I went to a pottery class a couple of years ago. I’ve always loved art—I’ve always painted and drawn. What felt like one minute somehow turned into two hours, and I was so sad because I wanted a pottery wheel.

Then I was talking to a friend of mine in Queenstown, Lil, and her aunty who lives in Dunedin was selling an old pottery kick wheel that their local primary school didn’t use anymore. It was hers, and then the school had it for a while before she decided to sell it.

So I convinced Nicky to drive all the way to Dunedin to grab this kick wheel and drive it back. Ever since, I’ve been doing pottery in our garage if we had one, or in front of the flat outside, and now my garage is my studio It’s like meditating, almost.

There was a crazy story about getting the pottery wheel, but maybe we’ll save that for another interview...

What's your favorite piece you've ever made?

That's hard... I think recently I've made some mugs that in my view are just perfect but they're yet to be fired. Other favorites though would be ones that I've sculpted that are different bodies and overall I think it's the meaningful ones the ones that mean something to someone.

if you could collaborate with any local artist or business who would it be?

That's a hard question, I like a lot of local businesses for different reasons, I'm collaborating with Munch Sapphic Events which is run by Emma and Caitlin which I'm quite inspired by what they're doing, they're just wanting to create a safe place for lesbians and sapphic people and I think that's so special and so necessary so I'm giving away some p***y plates to win. So what they're doing for our community is very special to me and very important, so I'm very grateful to be a part of that.

What is a dream space you'd love to see your work in?

People's homes, I want to meet some stranger one day and they invite me in and they have my piece in their home. I'd also love to see it in a local cafe. It'd be amazing to be a part of a gallery but I think it would be so special to see it in somebodies home, someone that I've just met.

If you were a pottery piece what would you be?

Honestly I would be a little pot for cat whiskers. I think that's very unexpected but very me.

If you loved reading Megan’s story, I’d be so grateful if you shared it with a friend or posted it to your socials, getting these voices out there really does make a difference.

And if you’re curious for more, you can check out the other interviews in the Out in Ōtautahi series, each one is full of heart, humor, and queer magic.

I’d honestly love to hear what you thought of this piece too.

feel free to flick me a message anytime!